Graphics: Mali
Analysis 1-16: Jcclutch
Analysis 17-32: Arod
Rams (0-0): Obviously the Super Bowl Champs are gonna be 1 heading into the season. Staffprd regressed but he’s still got his abilities which are the most important part. DK also signed Robbie Anderson but Traded away Malik Knowles which means his top 3 receivers are now all 31 as well as Stafford being 36. This is still an elite contender but the window might be closing.
Jaguars (0-0): The AFC champions who barely lost the Super Bowl are going to be back and probably even better with new QB Justin Fields. The offensive line is better but still not great and while I think the receivers are great HypeMike doesn’t feel the same. Barring another weird end of the season losing streak I can’t imagine anyone else being the AFC 1 seed.
Packers (0-0): Last year’s NFC 1 seed is back and with Aaron Rodgers officially retiring it’s the Hendon Hooker show now for them. This roster is still very good with their best players being relatively young. No AJ DIllon, No Aaron Rodgers, and no WRs over 80 ovr may be a problem but Mike will still have this team as a contender.
Commanders (0-0): Wimmy didn’t do much in the offseason besides trading up to grab Joe Alt to boost the offensive line. He’s officially sticking with Sam Howell after passing on Ewers and Maye so we’ll see how that works out for him but he’s proven he can do it with the team he has. Can he win the big games and make the Super Bowl this year?
Giants (0-0): Cook now has two superstar tackles and is sticking with Daniel “Vanilla Vick” Jones but the roster as a whole has really come together. If DJ or Saquon can get that dev game this team will truly take that leap and be a contender, but right now despite being a top 5 team, it’ll be tough to go through the gauntlet that is the NFC.
Dolphins (0-0): Que went from having a top 5 pick to the AFC championship in one season and definitely didn’t tank. He also may have made the super bowl if it wasn’t for abysmal special teams. Leary regressed down to 86 throw power and despite the 99 throw under pressure the Dolphins may jump back on the QB carousel. Corum, Tyreek Hill, Jaylen Waddle, and a pretty great defense keep this team a contender even without a sure thing at Quarterback.
Colts (0-0): First, I want to say I didn’t put myself here but I’ll take it because it might be my highest ranking all season. We had a fantastic season last year and the team improved every position of need. I’m still an 83 overall team but Quinn Ewers is much better than Will Levis on paper and Brock Bowers is huge for the offense. Time will tell if I can still contend with a harder schedule.
Cowboys (0-0): Jefe went off once he got back from vacation and I don’t see why he would slow down after a solid offseason. Tyree Jackson had already taken over at QB for the end of last season and now Dak’s contract is off the books. It was definitely questionable for the Cowboys to pass on Ewers and take a 3rd quality running back but this team should be in the playoffs this year.
Ravens (0-0): Ke has probably been the best team builder so far this cycle and the Ravens are poised to be back contending for the AFC to return to the Super Bowl and hopefully win it this time. With no real holes on the roster, they drafted quality skill position players to be available for different styles of play. Truly a scary team when playing their best.
Buccaneers (0-0): The fake Super Bowl winners of season 1 are ready to take on their first season without Tom Brady and while DTR was great last season, he didn’t play anyone good and/or trying with him at the helm. Tua will get the first couple starts cause of his cheese ways making DTR out with a suspension but this team is probably still a playoff lock due to their weak division and amazing defense.
Raiders (0-0): Matigy had these boys rolling but then lost some games to lose the 1 seed in the AFC last season but still got a very respectable playoff win before being eliminated by the Dolphins. The offseason was beyond questionable with now Jalen Hurts or Jayden Daniels at the helm we’ll see if Jacobs, Davante, and Waller can lead this team to more success now that the division has been reduced to a two team race.
Vikings (0-0): CEO made the playoffs last season but it wasn’t pretty and Zach Wilson hasn’t been great. They brought in Derek Carr if he struggles again but the team regressed more than it progressed in the offseason seemingly. Still a good team with a great user so do not take the Vikings lightly if you play them
Seahawks (0-0): CJ Stroud now has a year under his belt and made an all pro team as a rookie so they may be even better than last year. The Seahawks are full of great young players with physical beasts at WR and CB. Their offseason wasn’t anything crazy but with the Rams aging, Z may make a run at the division and be a true Super Bowl contender.
Bengals (0-0): Maybe he’s been distracted by his friend joining the league but Cammy has looked a lot worse recently and despite a very solid offseason adding great depth and some quality starters I don’t know if he’ll compete for the division this year. I hope he does well because he’s one of PML’s biggest heroes but the signs point to a down year.
Bills (0-0): TBruh has his roster pretty set and is paying Gabe Davis almost 30M this season so the offseason and draft were pretty much about depth and project players. The Bills have Josh Allen and a great user so they are a big threat and they’ll definitely be looking to take back the division from Que and the Dolphins. He has the 2nd place schedule now so he should be in for a bounceback season.
Bears (0-0): The rebuild is finally looking good and Spdot can hopefully finally compete for a wildcard spot but I don’t think the division title is in reach for them yet in the crowded NFC North. They downgraded at QB and missed on Gee Scott in the draft but overall the team improved a lot and while I wasn’t around last year, I know he was a great user and I expect that to be on display this season.
Titans (0-0): The rebuild should now be complete and the Titans will start contending for a playoff berth. It won’t be easy with the AFC South being on the competitive side- but that’s never held Bubba back from playoff action. He had a 2 season grace period, but we are ready to see this team compete at a higher level.
Saints (0-0): My early season hot take has the Saints winning the NFC South this season. They’ve shown glimpses of playing at a competitive level, and coach Burn went out and made some big boy moves to make a run at the divisional crown. A week 1 matchup with the Buccaneers will speak volumes in regards to their off-season moves and season 3 potential.
Cardinals (0-0): The schedule gods weren’t too kind to Dloyd. After his week 1 game versus the 49ers, the following 4 weeks are against Jefe, Que, KingMike, and DK. Not the type of schedule you want to see out the gate.
Falcons (0-0): Copy and paste Cardinals scenario to the Falcons as well. After a winnable week 1 matchup against HD and the Chargers, Greeny is hit with a true test early on with Wimmy, CEO, Codes, Z, and Cook. Although I was convinced the Falcons would compete this season, this early schedule may say otherwise.
Broncos (0-0): A lot of the Broncos success this season will ride on any improvement made to the defense. They finished in bottom 5- 10 in all major defensive categories which does not bold well for long term season success in PML. Other than brining in DJ Reader, I don’t really see any other notable upgrades.
Jets (0-0): I’m giving the Jets the benefit of the doubt here. They were expected to compete at a much higher level, at the very least a wildcard position. The Jets although out the gate maybe aren’t fully ready, after 2 or 3 seasons they blossom into one of the finest rosters in CFM full of young explosive talent. The Jets traded one of the more promising corners in the league (Sauce) for a quarterback that was passed along by two other teams already in 2 seasons. A big question mark team this season. Let’s see how this plays out.
Lions (0-0): A lot of the public is backing Curt to have a breakout type season. I am not sold yet, and I am not convinced Dak is the answer to any of the issues the Lions have had this cycle. The Lions surely overpaid for the former Cowboy signal caller, let’s see if the gamble will pay off.
Chiefs (0-0): An old friend is back with us this season as Mali gets his chance for the now departed Jac. We don’t know much about the labbing and scheming Mali has been doing with his time off. We should have a much clearer picture after week 4. He was given all the weapons to succeed, including but not limited to Pat Mahomes and the #1 overall pick, so this is a plug and play situation for Mali.
49ers (0-0): There were rumors of the 49ers trying to move on from Lance, but here we are. This defense has way too many glaring holes to compete with the more skilled users in the NFC. I expect more of the same from the 49ers this season. Beating the teams they’re capable of, but struggle with top tier contenders. The offense should be fun though with Kittle and a pair of 97 speed receivers.
Browns (0-0): Welcome new user who’s name slips my mind. Roster still seems like a plug and play situation with little maitence needed. Other than losing Greedy last off-season and Clowney this year, the cast is still here. Sadly, a lot of the young potential talent the team had season 1 are outgrowing their developmental window. Nevertheless, let’s see if new user could get these boys right.
Patriots (0-0): Caleb Williams and Najee Harris come in to revamp the offense in New England. Combine with a few killer draft picks iver the oast 2 seasons, Nef has the roster ready to roll. Could he make a competitive jump earlier than expected this year? Stay tuned.
Chargers (0-0): The Chargers franchise is stuck in Madden 23 purgatory this season. A very promising situation has led to a combined 9 wins this cycle through 2 seasons. Not what we expected from a team stacked with superstars and xfactors. Let’s see if HD can right the ship this season as he kicksoff week 1 vs Greeny and the Falcons in our co-GOTW.
Texans (0-0): Drama spent the off-season lobbying for the removal of Arod (instead of reflecting on his 4 wins and lousy transactions). Luckily he plays Arod week 1 and could now back up all his strong words. Keep in mind, this could be disastrous for the Gaming While Black brand if somehow, someway, he loses this game to a user who hasn’t won a game in an eternity. Oh man, I know he already has the excuses lined up. Doesn’t he always? This could be the ultimate story of karma, revenge, and humility in the Arod/Drama saga. Tune in Wednesday 12:00P.M.
Panthers (0-0): JT is the middle aged man who spends hours waxing and detailing his car but never takes it out for a ride. He’s got all the explosive weapons and takes good care of the roster but we are yet to see the plan put into motion. Maybe we are treated to early competitive JT this year. Let’s find out. 🤞
Eagles (0-0): Drake Maye finished the preseason with 0 td and 14 interceptions after telling Kenny Pickett to hold his beer. Eagles ‘Maye’ have taken a step backwards with the department of Wumbo (never thought I’d say this). Jury is still out on our new user CB as Jefe will head the welcoming committee week 1.
Steelers (0-0): Steelers have not won a game since week 15 of season 1. I threw for like 60 or 70 interceptions split between two quarterbacks- all after confidently trading my first round pick for Chris Jones last season. The wheels are falling off and the Steelers must make a quick turnaround or I am toast.
